Posted by: barbaraneill | July 4, 2014

Peeing standing up

I honestly never thought I’d live to see the day when I could pee standing up. I’m female, you see, and always have been. Now, I have in my possession, a little gadget that rewrites the rules when it comes to peeing.

I’m sure most of us must have heard of the ‘She-wee’ by now. It’s effectively a funnel that’s shaped to fit ‘lady parts’ and direct a flow of urine away from the body. I have to confess that when these items first appeared on the market, I was one of those doubting Thomas’s who couldn’t really see the advantage in such an item and I suppose I could have been accused of, well, taking the piss. It’s a different story, now, though.

My interest in these revolutionary funnels was sparked when I was making plans to go to a festival later in the summer. I would be camping for three nights and feasting my ears on live music. Brilliant! I wasn’t, however, looking forward to the much maligned experience of using festival toilets. I’ve done that countless times over the years and it’s never a pleasant experience, so I decided to make my own arrangements.

A bucket in the tent seemed a bit of a crude option, but I actually considered it, albeit briefly. Nowadays, it’s possible to buy buckets that are shaped like toilets and have a toilet seat, (complete with lid). Although this may seem like a more civilised option it is still a bucket with a lid, whichever way you look at it.

With the ‘bucket’ idea all but dismissed, my attention turned to alternatives and I was amazed to discover that it’s possible to buy bags, (such as Bog in a Bag), that contain a gel that absorbs urine and neutralises odour; is thoroughly hygienic and can be disposed of in a rubbish bin. Eureka! These bags, together with the aforementioned ‘She-wee’ could revolutionise my festival experience!

Conducting my research on the Internet, I discovered that that there are now several alternatives to the She-wee. I decided on a Whiz Freedom, as it is more pliable, is claimed to be completely leak-proof and happens to be purple. I love purple! No more long queues for the loos, with an unpleasant, smelly toilet at the end of it. No more traipsing across the campsite in the wee (sorry!) small hours. Whiz Freedom would, indeed, be as liberating as its name suggests.

In the early days of the She-wee, I failed to be grabbed by the joys of being able to pee standing up but, now that I can see a very positive use for this little device, I have actually gone ahead and invested in one.

My juvenile side can’t help hoping my female friends will follow my lead. Then we could all discover that previously forbidden joy of seeing who can pee highest up the wall!

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Responses

  1. or trying to write your name in the snow 🙂

    • Good point, Liz. That reminds me of years ago, when we had a harsh winter. My friend’s boyfriend wrote his name in the snow. Mind you, it looked suspiciously like my friend’s handwriting!


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